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Abraxas: Guardian of the Universe
Average customer rating: 2.5 out of 5 stars
  • The Worst Movie Ever. Really.
  • I MAY NOW DIE HAPPY!!
  • Too bad Abraxas can't guard me from bad acting...
 Abraxas: Guardian of the Universe
Starring: Johnny Askwith , Marjorie Bransfeld , Layne Coleman , Michael Copeman , and Marilyn Lightstone
Director: Damian Lee
Manufacturer: Brentwood Home Video
ProductGroup: DVD
Binding: DVD

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  1. The 10th Kingdom
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ASIN: B0001WTVWA
Release Date: 2004-03-09

Product Description

Abraxas (Jesse "The Body" Ventura) is a cop whose beat spans two galaxies.

His mission: To stop planets form destroying themselves through ecological suicide and senseless war. Secundus (Sven Ole Thorsen) is his ex partner who has recently turned renegade and is looking for the anti-life equation...An unlimited source of power that could destroy the universe.

Watch as two superpowered beings wage an all out battle that will forever decide the fate of Earth!


System Requirements:
  • Running Time 90 Min

    Format: DVD MOVIE

    Customer Reviews:

    1 out of 5 stars The Worst Movie Ever. Really. .......2005-12-05

    This is the worst movie ever made. I am serious, no joke here. I watched the whole thing just to make sure.

    5 out of 5 stars I MAY NOW DIE HAPPY!!.......2005-08-24

    This could be one the most influential movies in modern history. The stunning performances, the non-stop action, the half-naked-man-to-boy relationship. Don't forget one of the most quotable lines in modern film making..."my Box has VD, trust me". unforgetable! After viewing this movie i also had a strange craving for Pepsi-cola. Seeing as the only store in the whole movie sold only pepsi and pepsi related paraphenalia... if i could rate this movie i'de give it 3 thumbs up... i recomend this movie to everyone on earth. In fact, the bible is no longer needed now that man has ABRAXUS: GUARDIAN OF THE UNIVERSE!!!!!!

    2 out of 5 stars Too bad Abraxas can't guard me from bad acting..........2004-07-27

    Ya know, as a ringside color commentator, Jesse Ventura did a pretty good job of gettin' good & fired up, and delivered his thoughts with all of the over-the-top bravado and just plain meanness that he could muster. But as the title character of this sorry sci-fi action-thriller, 'The Body' hardly emotes at all. Not helping matters is the fact that he does his lines in the kinda monotone that made those InFone radio ads he cut a while back sound oh-so-uncompelling. Sheesh, Body-Man, howzabout putting a little inflection in your delivery here so we know you're still breathing, huh? Er, not that I'd say that to yer face or anything, heh...

    Then there are the obvious lifts from-- er, I mean tributes to the New Gods comic book series, created by the late, great Jack 'King' Kirby. One glaring ripoff is the villainous Secundus' (played by Sven Thorsen, best known as the uber-mall-cop LaFours from 'Mallrats') search for the 'Anti-Life Equation' that will give him ultimate power and control... which are the exact same things the New God Darkseid seeks with his own pursuit of the same equation! Then there are the Answer Boxes both Abraxas and Secundus carry on their persons, which have some of the same powers and abilities that the Mother Boxes-- used by many of the good-guy New Gods-- possess. Hey, I think I hear Jack Kirby turning in his grave...

    On a final note: my review is of the Digital Works release of 'Abraxas'. The picture quality of this platter is pretty sad-- there's pixelation in a few cuts from one scene to another, the pictuere clarity's about as bad as a well-worn rental tape, and the nighttime scenes are so dark you can hardly make out what's goin' on. Then there's the sound mix, which is also pretty freakin' cr@ppy. 'Course, seeing as how this was put out by the super-cheapie Passion Productions/Digital Works outfit, ya gotta expect such things. 'Course, seein' as how I laid down a mere two smackers for a brand new copy of this movie-- which is less than what I'd've paid to rent it from the local Hollywood Video, BTW-- I guess I shouldn't complain too much. In this instance I got what I paid for...

    'Late
    AbrAxas Guardian Of The Universe
    Average customer rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    • Misspelled title
    		 AbrAxas Guardian Of The Universe
    Starring: Jesse Ventura
    Director: Damian Lee
    Manufacturer: Passion Productions
    ProductGroup: DVD
    Binding: DVD

    GeneralGeneral | Action & Adventure | Genres | DVD | Video
    GeneralGeneral | Science Fiction & Fantasy | Genres | DVD | Video
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    Lee, DamianLee, Damian | ( L ) | Directors | Stores | DVD | Video
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    ASIN: B00028EU2E
    Release Date: 2002-05-15

    Product Description

    Ten thousand year old cosmic cop Abraxas descends to planet Earth from his native planet of Sardacian on a search for his renegade partner Secundus, who has come to impregnate human women. Abraxas must seclude the woman and her child from Secundus and to stop Earth's inhabitants from environmentally self-destructing.

    Customer Reviews:

    5 out of 5 stars Misspelled title.......2005-01-18

    The title of this DVD is "Abraxas" -- whoever typed the title reversed the 'ra' to be 'ar'.
    Abraxas: Guardian of the Universe
    Average customer rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    • What a waste of muscle
    • SVEN-OLE THORSON AND JESSE VENTURA: BEST DUO OF ALL TIME?
    • Jesse "The Space Cop" Ventura
    • What's with all the whiners?
    • A movie that is to be compared to the classics
    		 Abraxas: Guardian of the Universe
    Starring: Sonja Belliveau , James Belushi , John Blackwood (II) , Marjorie Bransfield , and Adrian Burnett
    Manufacturer: Front Row Entertainment
    ProductGroup: DVD
    Binding: DVD

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    ASIN: B00005M2DV
    Release Date: 2001-06-06

    Amazon.com

    Who would have guessed that before politicking for governor, policing the galaxy was penciled in on Jesse "the Body" Ventura's curriculum vitae, right after professional wrestler? As Abraxas, Ventura plays a bi-Galaxian cop who chases a rogue law enforcer from the northern stars to the North Woods of Minnesota. "Good cop, bad cop" takes on a whole new meaning when Abraxas pursues the evil Secundus (Sven-Ole Thorsen) through assorted snow banks, evergreens, and a winter wonderland of death traps, en route to a final confrontation involving the anti-life equation, a limitless power source for the power-hungry Secundus. Not surprisingly, his acquisition of the anti-life equation will end life on this planet as we know it. Will Abraxas prevail? Helping Ventura wrestle with this question is Sonia, portrayed by Marjorie Bransfield, a young innocent, immaculately impregnated by Secundus. James Belushi, as an earthling law-enforcement type, lends a late helping hand.

    Unfortunately, the biography portion of the DVD neglects to illuminate Ventura's earlier career, when he ably presided over a much smaller jurisdiction than Abraxas. As a pro wrestler, Ventura typically clocked in for work in a pink boa, wraparound shades, and kicky short-shorts--a much livelier uniform than that issued to guardians of the universe. --Stephan Magcosta

    Customer Reviews:

    2 out of 5 stars What a waste of muscle.......2005-06-17

    The boys from Running Man (Jesse Ventura and Sven-Ole Thorsen) are back again. Only this time they hook up with director Damien Lee for what I can only describe as a low budget attempt at making a derivative science fiction film. To be fair this movie isn't completely bad, but it's not in the realm of good either.

    Funny thing is you can find that this movie takes a page off of other sci-fi movies, good or bad. I saw elements from such films as Terminator, Firestarter, I Come In Peace and Xtro. Not exactly a winning combination. What makes the story even more convoluted is they don't take enough time to really explain what's up with concepts like "anti-life equation" or "co-mater". You end up wondering if anybody really knows what this stuff is.

    The acting is... well... dry for the most part with some decent performances now and then. James Belushi's performance was the best by far. Unfortunately his part was the lamest by far and could have been taken out with absolutely no loss of story (what little there is), though that would be taking out a rather humorous scene as well. Special effects aren't special and were mercifully few and far between. Also the audio is monophonic. That's right boys and girls. It was made in the 90's and they couldn't even mix the movie in stereo. Well considering this is an ultra low budget movie you can't really expect much anyway.

    As canned as most of the acting was you would find some nice moments with Ventura and some (just some) of the scripting was entertaining. For example nasty villain Secundus (Thorsen) finishes eating at a diner and is given a bill. Not knowing what to do with it he eats it (trust me, it's funny when you see it). Ahh... little moments like that had me end up smiling by the end of the movie.

    The best I can recommend for Abraxas is is to find it in one of those sci-fi movie packs where you get a mess of low-budget movies at one low price. If you can get past the low budget effects and canned script then there is hope you might enjoy it. Me? ...meh.

    5 out of 5 stars SVEN-OLE THORSON AND JESSE VENTURA: BEST DUO OF ALL TIME?.......2004-04-17

    "Abraxas: Guardian of the Universe" is the best thing ever filmed in northern Ontario. A "thrilling" chase opens this unintentional comedic masterwork, which features many "all-time" moments, such as:

    MOST PATHETIC CAMEO OF ALL TIME: I don't know how they got Jim Belushi to drive out to Thornbury to be in Abraxas, but he appears in the worst scene in the film. Somebody must have done him one hell of a favour, because there's no way he did this for money - since the producers clearly had none.

    MOST INAPPROPRIATE SCORE OF ALL TIME: Lame saxophone and soft jazz should never be combined with fights and chases - let alone the sketchy scene with a half-naked Ventura and a young boy where Abraxas' "tale of two men" bit comes off as disturbing, and thus funny.

    LEAST PLOT EXPLANATION OF ALL TIME: If you can tell me what "the colmater" is (beyond the fact that it's the kid) I'd really like to know. Also, the exact nature of the "anti-life equation" (and the equally sinister "anti-life universe")is open to debate.

    All of these diverse elements combine to form some serious low-budget hilarity. Ventura and Thorson discussing the anti-life equation is right up there with Monty Python's Dead Parrot bit as far as I'm concerned. If you don't laugh at this movie you are either soulless or retarded.

    "Bring me the colmater!"

    4 out of 5 stars Jesse "The Space Cop" Ventura.......2003-09-15

    As a Minnesotan, I take a strange pride that my state elected Jesse Ventura, former pro wrestler, and grade Z movie actor as Governor. Of, course, Jesse has been in several films, most notably "Predator" with Arnold Schwarzenegger (possible future governor of California...hmmm...is there a trend here?)

    In Abraxas: Guardian of the Universe, Jesse is an intergalactic space cop of some variety who tries to track down the evil Secundus, played by Sven-Ole Thorsen who has had a space child with knowledge of an important equation that can destroy the universe.

    This movie is cheesy and never too dark (even though the director was trying to make it dark) yet it still manages to be entertaining in a MST3K sort of manner. Many great scenes abound, including watching Secundus eat breakfast (he orders the entire menu), watching Jesse's wrist radio thing interrupt romance, and my personal favorite: watching school principal Jim Belushi attempt to look serious in an embarrassingly badly written counseling session.

    This is a great little cheap movie to watch when you just want to relax and have some fun with friends. Sure! You betcha!

    3 out of 5 stars What's with all the whiners?.......2002-10-04

    Sure the movie is low budget, kind of forgettable and bad. That doesn't make it a shoe-in for a zero rating, though folks. We've got the immortal line in this flick: "My box has VD." And let's not forget the slow-motion fighting to Kenny G inspired music, with random nonsensical explosions happening in the background...or the woman who has a baby with all her clothes on! There's PLENTY of entertainment to be gleaned from this movie, you cinema snobs just don't know where to look for it. All in all, I recommend it to people who want to see unintentional humor, and who don't expect every movie to be made with a 100 million plus budget. Jeez...if you wanna see a true blue zero rating, rent Sextette, and leave this modest effort alone!

    5 out of 5 stars A movie that is to be compared to the classics.......2001-07-01

    When the true movie critics speaks about the science fiction classics we often get lectures on star wars and other high budget motion pictures. What we have to remember is the ones who never got into the herds view of sight. One of these movies are Abraxas. A movie which never got the attention it deserved. If the true soldiers of iron culture will ever emerge, Abraxas will their movie of inspiration.
    Great SciFi Thrillers (The Disappearance Of Flight 412 / Slipstream / Abraxas, Guardian Of The Universe)
    Average customer rating: 1 out of 5 stars
    • washed out pictures and drop out sound make this one BAD DISC
    		 Great SciFi Thrillers (The Disappearance Of Flight 412 / Slipstream / Abraxas, Guardian Of The Universe)
    Starring: Morris Buchanan , Stanley Bennett Clay , Brent Davis , Bradford Dillman , and Herbert Ellis
    Director: Jud Taylor
    Manufacturer: Bfs Entertainment
    ProductGroup: DVD
    Binding: DVD

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    ASIN: B00005QW4V
    Release Date: 2002-01-08

    Description

    3 Great Movies on 1 DVD. Star Power, Exciting Genre with Extras on each DVD.

    Customer Reviews:

    1 out of 5 stars washed out pictures and drop out sound make this one BAD DISC.......2006-04-28

    i can't really review the movies because the transfers are so bad I CAN'T WATCH THE MOVIES!!!!!!!!! i'm no prude about transfers,i own many of those 50 pack movie sets and for the low price i know the quilty isn't going to be good,but you can't watch this set. don't waste your money find these movies in oyher better collections
    Abraxas/Laser Mission Double Feature
    Average customer rating: Not rated
      		Abraxas/Laser Mission Double Feature

      ProductGroup: DVD
      Binding: DVD

      GeneralGeneral | Special Interests | Genres | DVD | Video
      Product Features:
      • Standard Full Frame
      • Color
      • Stereo Sound
      • Interactive Menus
      • 85 Minutes each

      ASIN: B000FP94SE

      Product Description

      Abraxas, an intergalactic, alien police officer, has just been sent to Earth to track down and apprehend an alien renegade. Laser Mission - The CIA and KGB are in a race to reach a scientist in Cuba. The race is on and the fate of the world is in their hands.
      Abraxas
      Average customer rating: 2.5 out of 5 stars
      • The Worst Movie Ever. Really.
      • I MAY NOW DIE HAPPY!!
      • Too bad Abraxas can't guard me from bad acting...
      		 Abraxas
      Starring: Ventura , and Thorsen
      Manufacturer: Simitar Ent.
      ProductGroup: Video
      Binding: VHS Tape

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      ASIN: 6305245975
      Release Date: 1999-01-26

      Customer Reviews:

      1 out of 5 stars The Worst Movie Ever. Really. .......2005-12-05

      This is the worst movie ever made. I am serious, no joke here. I watched the whole thing just to make sure.

      5 out of 5 stars I MAY NOW DIE HAPPY!!.......2005-08-24

      This could be one the most influential movies in modern history. The stunning performances, the non-stop action, the half-naked-man-to-boy relationship. Don't forget one of the most quotable lines in modern film making..."my Box has VD, trust me". unforgetable! After viewing this movie i also had a strange craving for Pepsi-cola. Seeing as the only store in the whole movie sold only pepsi and pepsi related paraphenalia... if i could rate this movie i'de give it 3 thumbs up... i recomend this movie to everyone on earth. In fact, the bible is no longer needed now that man has ABRAXUS: GUARDIAN OF THE UNIVERSE!!!!!!

      2 out of 5 stars Too bad Abraxas can't guard me from bad acting..........2004-07-27

      Ya know, as a ringside color commentator, Jesse Ventura did a pretty good job of gettin' good & fired up, and delivered his thoughts with all of the over-the-top bravado and just plain meanness that he could muster. But as the title character of this sorry sci-fi action-thriller, 'The Body' hardly emotes at all. Not helping matters is the fact that he does his lines in the kinda monotone that made those InFone radio ads he cut a while back sound oh-so-uncompelling. Sheesh, Body-Man, howzabout putting a little inflection in your delivery here so we know you're still breathing, huh? Er, not that I'd say that to yer face or anything, heh...

      Then there are the obvious lifts from-- er, I mean tributes to the New Gods comic book series, created by the late, great Jack 'King' Kirby. One glaring ripoff is the villainous Secundus' (played by Sven Thorsen, best known as the uber-mall-cop LaFours from 'Mallrats') search for the 'Anti-Life Equation' that will give him ultimate power and control... which are the exact same things the New God Darkseid seeks with his own pursuit of the same equation! Then there are the Answer Boxes both Abraxas and Secundus carry on their persons, which have some of the same powers and abilities that the Mother Boxes-- used by many of the good-guy New Gods-- possess. Hey, I think I hear Jack Kirby turning in his grave...

      On a final note: my review is of the Digital Works release of 'Abraxas'. The picture quality of this platter is pretty sad-- there's pixelation in a few cuts from one scene to another, the pictuere clarity's about as bad as a well-worn rental tape, and the nighttime scenes are so dark you can hardly make out what's goin' on. Then there's the sound mix, which is also pretty freakin' cr@ppy. 'Course, seeing as how this was put out by the super-cheapie Passion Productions/Digital Works outfit, ya gotta expect such things. 'Course, seein' as how I laid down a mere two smackers for a brand new copy of this movie-- which is less than what I'd've paid to rent it from the local Hollywood Video, BTW-- I guess I shouldn't complain too much. In this instance I got what I paid for...

      'Late
      Abraxas
      Average customer rating: 3 out of 5 stars
      • What a waste of muscle
      • SVEN-OLE THORSON AND JESSE VENTURA: BEST DUO OF ALL TIME?
      • Jesse "The Space Cop" Ventura
      • What's with all the whiners?
      • A movie that is to be compared to the classics
      		 Abraxas
      Starring: Sonja Belliveau , James Belushi , John Blackwood (II) , Marjorie Bransfield , and Adrian Burnett
      Manufacturer: Simitar Ent.
      ProductGroup: DVD
      Binding: DVD

      GeneralGeneral | Action & Adventure | Genres | DVD | Video
      Sci-Fi ActionSci-Fi Action | Science Fiction & Fantasy | Genres | DVD | Video
      GeneralGeneral | Science Fiction & Fantasy | Genres | DVD | Video
      End of the WorldEnd of the World | By Theme | Science Fiction & Fantasy | Genres | DVD | Video
      FuturisticFuturistic | Science Fiction & Fantasy | Genres | DVD | Video
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      AliensAliens | Science Fiction & Fantasy | Genres | DVD | Video
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      Ventura, JesseVentura, Jesse | ( V ) | Actors & Actresses | Stores | DVD | Video
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      1. Ballistic - Ecks vs. Sever

      ASIN: 6305245983
      Release Date: 1999-01-26

      Amazon.com

      Who would have guessed that before politicking for governor, policing the galaxy was penciled in on Jesse "the Body" Ventura's curriculum vitae, right after professional wrestler? As Abraxas, Ventura plays a bi-Galaxian cop who chases a rogue law enforcer from the northern stars to the North Woods of Minnesota. "Good cop, bad cop" takes on a whole new meaning when Abraxas pursues the evil Secundus (Sven-Ole Thorsen) through assorted snow banks, evergreens, and a winter wonderland of death traps, en route to a final confrontation involving the anti-life equation, a limitless power source for the power-hungry Secundus. Not surprisingly, his acquisition of the anti-life equation will end life on this planet as we know it. Will Abraxas prevail? Helping Ventura wrestle with this question is Sonia, portrayed by Marjorie Bransfield, a young innocent, immaculately impregnated by Secundus. James Belushi, as an earthling law-enforcement type, lends a late helping hand.

      Unfortunately, the biography portion of the DVD neglects to illuminate Ventura's earlier career, when he ably presided over a much smaller jurisdiction than Abraxas. As a pro wrestler, Ventura typically clocked in for work in a pink boa, wraparound shades, and kicky short-shorts--a much livelier uniform than that issued to guardians of the universe. --Stephan Magcosta

      Customer Reviews:

      2 out of 5 stars What a waste of muscle.......2005-06-17

      The boys from Running Man (Jesse Ventura and Sven-Ole Thorsen) are back again. Only this time they hook up with director Damien Lee for what I can only describe as a low budget attempt at making a derivative science fiction film. To be fair this movie isn't completely bad, but it's not in the realm of good either.

      Funny thing is you can find that this movie takes a page off of other sci-fi movies, good or bad. I saw elements from such films as Terminator, Firestarter, I Come In Peace and Xtro. Not exactly a winning combination. What makes the story even more convoluted is they don't take enough time to really explain what's up with concepts like "anti-life equation" or "co-mater". You end up wondering if anybody really knows what this stuff is.

      The acting is... well... dry for the most part with some decent performances now and then. James Belushi's performance was the best by far. Unfortunately his part was the lamest by far and could have been taken out with absolutely no loss of story (what little there is), though that would be taking out a rather humorous scene as well. Special effects aren't special and were mercifully few and far between. Also the audio is monophonic. That's right boys and girls. It was made in the 90's and they couldn't even mix the movie in stereo. Well considering this is an ultra low budget movie you can't really expect much anyway.

      As canned as most of the acting was you would find some nice moments with Ventura and some (just some) of the scripting was entertaining. For example nasty villain Secundus (Thorsen) finishes eating at a diner and is given a bill. Not knowing what to do with it he eats it (trust me, it's funny when you see it). Ahh... little moments like that had me end up smiling by the end of the movie.

      The best I can recommend for Abraxas is is to find it in one of those sci-fi movie packs where you get a mess of low-budget movies at one low price. If you can get past the low budget effects and canned script then there is hope you might enjoy it. Me? ...meh.

      5 out of 5 stars SVEN-OLE THORSON AND JESSE VENTURA: BEST DUO OF ALL TIME?.......2004-04-17

      "Abraxas: Guardian of the Universe" is the best thing ever filmed in northern Ontario. A "thrilling" chase opens this unintentional comedic masterwork, which features many "all-time" moments, such as:

      MOST PATHETIC CAMEO OF ALL TIME: I don't know how they got Jim Belushi to drive out to Thornbury to be in Abraxas, but he appears in the worst scene in the film. Somebody must have done him one hell of a favour, because there's no way he did this for money - since the producers clearly had none.

      MOST INAPPROPRIATE SCORE OF ALL TIME: Lame saxophone and soft jazz should never be combined with fights and chases - let alone the sketchy scene with a half-naked Ventura and a young boy where Abraxas' "tale of two men" bit comes off as disturbing, and thus funny.

      LEAST PLOT EXPLANATION OF ALL TIME: If you can tell me what "the colmater" is (beyond the fact that it's the kid) I'd really like to know. Also, the exact nature of the "anti-life equation" (and the equally sinister "anti-life universe")is open to debate.

      All of these diverse elements combine to form some serious low-budget hilarity. Ventura and Thorson discussing the anti-life equation is right up there with Monty Python's Dead Parrot bit as far as I'm concerned. If you don't laugh at this movie you are either soulless or retarded.

      "Bring me the colmater!"

      4 out of 5 stars Jesse "The Space Cop" Ventura.......2003-09-15

      As a Minnesotan, I take a strange pride that my state elected Jesse Ventura, former pro wrestler, and grade Z movie actor as Governor. Of, course, Jesse has been in several films, most notably "Predator" with Arnold Schwarzenegger (possible future governor of California...hmmm...is there a trend here?)

      In Abraxas: Guardian of the Universe, Jesse is an intergalactic space cop of some variety who tries to track down the evil Secundus, played by Sven-Ole Thorsen who has had a space child with knowledge of an important equation that can destroy the universe.

      This movie is cheesy and never too dark (even though the director was trying to make it dark) yet it still manages to be entertaining in a MST3K sort of manner. Many great scenes abound, including watching Secundus eat breakfast (he orders the entire menu), watching Jesse's wrist radio thing interrupt romance, and my personal favorite: watching school principal Jim Belushi attempt to look serious in an embarrassingly badly written counseling session.

      This is a great little cheap movie to watch when you just want to relax and have some fun with friends. Sure! You betcha!

      3 out of 5 stars What's with all the whiners?.......2002-10-04

      Sure the movie is low budget, kind of forgettable and bad. That doesn't make it a shoe-in for a zero rating, though folks. We've got the immortal line in this flick: "My box has VD." And let's not forget the slow-motion fighting to Kenny G inspired music, with random nonsensical explosions happening in the background...or the woman who has a baby with all her clothes on! There's PLENTY of entertainment to be gleaned from this movie, you cinema snobs just don't know where to look for it. All in all, I recommend it to people who want to see unintentional humor, and who don't expect every movie to be made with a 100 million plus budget. Jeez...if you wanna see a true blue zero rating, rent Sextette, and leave this modest effort alone!

      5 out of 5 stars A movie that is to be compared to the classics.......2001-07-01

      When the true movie critics speaks about the science fiction classics we often get lectures on star wars and other high budget motion pictures. What we have to remember is the ones who never got into the herds view of sight. One of these movies are Abraxas. A movie which never got the attention it deserved. If the true soldiers of iron culture will ever emerge, Abraxas will their movie of inspiration.
      Sci-Fi, Vol. 3: Voyage to the Prehistoric Planet/They Came From Beyond Space/Abraxas/First Spaceshi
      Average customer rating: Not rated
        		Sci-Fi, Vol. 3: Voyage to the Prehistoric Planet/They Came From Beyond Space/Abraxas/First Spaceshi
        Starring: Great Sci-Fi Classics
        Manufacturer: Platinum Disc
        ProductGroup: DVD
        Binding: DVD

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        ASIN: B0000B1OB9
        Release Date: 2003-07-22
        Abraxas/Slipstream
        Average customer rating: Not rated
          		Abraxas/Slipstream
          Starring: Abraxas , and Slipstream
          Manufacturer: Bci Eclipse
          ProductGroup: DVD
          Binding: DVD

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          ASIN: B0007VY4SG
          Release Date: 2005-02-22
          Abraxas
          Average customer rating: 2.5 out of 5 stars
          • The Worst Movie Ever. Really.
          • I MAY NOW DIE HAPPY!!
          • Too bad Abraxas can't guard me from bad acting...
          		 Abraxas
          Starring: Jesse Ventura
          Manufacturer: Do Not Use
          ProductGroup: Video
          Binding: VHS Tape

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          ASIN: 630268661X
          Release Date: 1993-04-21

          Customer Reviews:

          1 out of 5 stars The Worst Movie Ever. Really. .......2005-12-05

          This is the worst movie ever made. I am serious, no joke here. I watched the whole thing just to make sure.

          5 out of 5 stars I MAY NOW DIE HAPPY!!.......2005-08-24

          This could be one the most influential movies in modern history. The stunning performances, the non-stop action, the half-naked-man-to-boy relationship. Don't forget one of the most quotable lines in modern film making..."my Box has VD, trust me". unforgetable! After viewing this movie i also had a strange craving for Pepsi-cola. Seeing as the only store in the whole movie sold only pepsi and pepsi related paraphenalia... if i could rate this movie i'de give it 3 thumbs up... i recomend this movie to everyone on earth. In fact, the bible is no longer needed now that man has ABRAXUS: GUARDIAN OF THE UNIVERSE!!!!!!

          2 out of 5 stars Too bad Abraxas can't guard me from bad acting..........2004-07-27

          Ya know, as a ringside color commentator, Jesse Ventura did a pretty good job of gettin' good & fired up, and delivered his thoughts with all of the over-the-top bravado and just plain meanness that he could muster. But as the title character of this sorry sci-fi action-thriller, 'The Body' hardly emotes at all. Not helping matters is the fact that he does his lines in the kinda monotone that made those InFone radio ads he cut a while back sound oh-so-uncompelling. Sheesh, Body-Man, howzabout putting a little inflection in your delivery here so we know you're still breathing, huh? Er, not that I'd say that to yer face or anything, heh...

          Then there are the obvious lifts from-- er, I mean tributes to the New Gods comic book series, created by the late, great Jack 'King' Kirby. One glaring ripoff is the villainous Secundus' (played by Sven Thorsen, best known as the uber-mall-cop LaFours from 'Mallrats') search for the 'Anti-Life Equation' that will give him ultimate power and control... which are the exact same things the New God Darkseid seeks with his own pursuit of the same equation! Then there are the Answer Boxes both Abraxas and Secundus carry on their persons, which have some of the same powers and abilities that the Mother Boxes-- used by many of the good-guy New Gods-- possess. Hey, I think I hear Jack Kirby turning in his grave...

          On a final note: my review is of the Digital Works release of 'Abraxas'. The picture quality of this platter is pretty sad-- there's pixelation in a few cuts from one scene to another, the pictuere clarity's about as bad as a well-worn rental tape, and the nighttime scenes are so dark you can hardly make out what's goin' on. Then there's the sound mix, which is also pretty freakin' cr@ppy. 'Course, seeing as how this was put out by the super-cheapie Passion Productions/Digital Works outfit, ya gotta expect such things. 'Course, seein' as how I laid down a mere two smackers for a brand new copy of this movie-- which is less than what I'd've paid to rent it from the local Hollywood Video, BTW-- I guess I shouldn't complain too much. In this instance I got what I paid for...

          'Late

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          Vernascht!